As Alan Johnson calls for a national movement on obesity and David Cameron is ‘pretty hacked off’ by the theft of his bicycle, Laura’s bureau is not asking the obvious questions (ex-laxed or choreographed; will Dave get his bike back?). Instead, the question that the bureau can’t keep under its lid is where all the corpses of the dead flying ants have gone now that flying ant day is over. Laura’s bureau is a thought leader in the funerals of insects and will soon be filling up with Fly Funeral, Laura’s in-progress novel about fried chicken, London’s -hams and cream fingers.