Laura’s Bureau

There’s been a lot about the credit crunch recently. Consumers of Sunday newspapers learn about how the credit crunch might affect them by reading about suburban solicitor’s who have been forced out of their cars and onto public transport.

Every headline seems to have the phrase ‘in the credit crunch’ added to it. Chocolate in the credit crunch. Funerals and corpse donation in the credit crunch. Fat children in the credit crunch. Fried chicken and burgers in the credit crunch. Indeed, this has become so commonplace that when reading them, I inadvertantly add those four words to the end of every headline I read.  Everything must be seen in light of the credit crunch.  Even Guildford.

But there are two questions that all this commentary and analysis have failed to shed any light on.

Firstly, why has Cadbury’s not brought out a limited edition credit crunchie? Not only would this be fun, tasty and trend-setting but it would also help to restore consumer confidence. Going into their local budgens or lidl to buy a couple of credit crunchies to sell on ebay or to stockpile when the future food crisis bites, consumers would be reminded of the things that they have neglected to buy over the last few months, though many have still been ‘truffling around for bargains’. Confidence would be restored, retailers would no longer see such devasting cuts to their billlions of profit and fat cats would keep their weight up.

Secondly, admist all the talk of whether the latest victims of the credit crunch – Lehman Brothers employees – will get refunded for the money they have put on their canteen cards, not one commentator asked whether crunchies had been the first chocolate bar to sell out.

Perhaps the FAQs that have appeared in most newspapers and sites need to take on a lighter tone and educate us about the role of the crunchie in the credit crunch.  This might be more digestable – depending on how much you like honeycomb - than what the top 1% are doing with most of the world’s bish.